Happy Monday! It suddenly feels like fall and I think I’m okay with that. I actually love fall but hate that it seems to stay for such a short period of time. I want it to be fall for months and winter for weeks, but sadly, I’m not in charge of the weather!
This is a really busy week for me with teaching my usual lessons plus some extra ones, my baseball team banquet (here’s hoping I win something better than another ugly sweatshirt this year!), Trudy arriving and then all the Scotiabank race events!
Three weeks ago I wasn’t excited about Scotiabank at all. In fact, I was panicking a little (A LOT!) and thinking for dropping to the 5k. Then I read this blog post by Stephanie of RunTriMom and a portion of it grabbed my attention:
This training cycle was full of ups and downs. I hired a coach for only a few months but then realized that for ME…coaching simply doesn’t work. It sucked the enjoyment out of it for me. I did learn a lot during those few months but I went promptly back to being self coached and that is the space I will remain for now. Ironman and racing has never been about the numbers for me. Finishing Times don’t matter. Finish Lines and who is at the end of the race does matter to me. I find a lot of people who obsess over times usually end up having “bad days” or “bad races” and truly I believe anyone who does this sport is lucky to show up to the start line and the finish line is a bonus and celebration of LIFE and what the human spirit and body are capable of when they align and connect. There is nothing “bad” about a race, except unneeded pressure and attitudes. I guess I realize with age, life is fleeting and health is fleeting. So every time I can do what I love with good health, I feel extremely grateful. Especially when my family and friends are there to celebrate with me.
I promptly saved a screenshot of this part of her post and have been thinking about it ever since. Why have I been stressed about running this half? Because I am not prepared? Because of what someone else will think of me? Because of stupid things that don’t actually matter?! Yep…yep…yep.
I made a conscious decision to let all of those things go. On Sunday, I am going to be slow and I don’t care. It’s going to hurt, but so what?! I get to run the streets of Toronto that I know and love. I can picture the entire course in my mind right now and it is an awesome course! I am going to smile even when I don’t want to because I’m not a quitter! I might have missed almost all of my race goals for this year, but 2018 is coming! I am going to listen to Arcade Fire on full blast in anticipation of the concert on November 3 and if I want–I’m going to sing. Life IS short and next year, I might not be able to run at all; so, on Sunday I am going to run with a grateful heart. I will be grateful for each step I am able to run and I will be grateful for each person that I know will be at the finish!
Whether or not you’re ready for your next race–embrace it and enjoy the time out there on your feet. Remember to smile and I will see so many of you on Sunday!